I am Back Now

So I am home and I feel so spectacular. Hannah had ice skating tonight and watching her seems like I am watching an angel on ice skates. she glides like she is on air and twirls like a ceramic ballerina music box. She is incredibly graceful. She is beautiful. I am just so glad to be home. So glad to be back. So glad to be alive.
So Saturday was my first real "dinner" in a while. Brian picked me up with Hannah and he brought me straight to The Texas Roadhouse. I was a little tired and aggravated but it was sooo good. I went home to bed right after that but it was a good treat. I won't be going out dancing or drinking alcohol for a while, so I have decided to write some poetry and possibly finish Hannah's scrap book. I am itching to do somehting crazy but I guess I can wait.
Friday night I am cooking for my best friends Liz and Spanky. I am going to invite Hoss over to join us also because we have resolved our issues and are trying to work our issues out. He means alot to me and this is important.
See, the thing is, I have had so much time to actually analyze and pick through my entire life. I somewhat was "saved" a few weeks ago. I have decided to live my life by the minute, cherishing every second with the idea that tomorrow may never come. I am spending every waking minute with my heaven sent daughter and my very loyal friends and of course my family. I will no longer EVER take anyone or anything for granted. I will not tell a lie, I will not be hateful and I will and already have forgive anyone or anything that has negatively affected my life. I will also apoligize to anyone whom I may have hurt unintentionally or intentionally. I am going to quit smoking. I am going to thank the stars every night for the gift I have been given and for all of my treasures. I have the most incredible support system in the universe and I am so thankful and so grateful.
I love everyone of you to pieces.
I want all of my dreams to come true and I want to be here when all of Hannah's come true.
I will make it all happen.
I have the power, the will and I know the way.
I just need the energy.

www.rubysfire.com

Super Love . .give me some some some of that love love love. . .. I am horny baby . . . . Need it now!!!! Come to Ruby (hahahhaha)

Superlove is something that they say is very rare
In the dark, In your world it's everywhere
And I feel like an x x rated movie star
It's the way you love me down
Everytime we kiss you bring out the woman in me
Everytime you holler out my name you set me free
I am a sex-o-matic venus freak when I'm with you
And I will stop it only when you tell me to
I am the automatic easy freak all over you
And I will stop it only when you tell me to.

Superlove
Give me some
We are the genius of love
Feel like an xx rated movie star
It's the way you love me down
Everytime we kiss you bring out the woman in me
Everytime you holler out my name you set me free
I am a sex-o-matic venus freak when I'm with you
And I will stop it only when you tell me to
I am the automatic easy freak all over you
And I will stop it only when you tell me to.

When we seek and hide
When my hands are tied
69 positions and
whip cream all over my skin
lick you from bottom to roof (hahahah)
love to get down with you
I am a sex-o-matic venus freak when I'm with you
And I will stop it only when you tell me to
I am the automatic easy freak all over you
And I will stop it only when you tell me to.

***KATIE ****
www.rubysfire.com

I am in a better mood this morning. Good news all around today. I feel better, my head is clear and my body feels refreshed. I am excited for the upcoming events in regards to my book and I cannot wait until Ruby's Fire is published. I have had a lot of time to edit and correct and switch things up so I am getting siked!!!
At any rate, I want to thank everyone in my life who has helped me through my trials and tribulations, all of the mood swings, the stress and all of my happy and fun times. I am fortunate to have you all in my life. Liz and Spanky, Renae and Linda, Hoss and Lou, Jackie and Ali, I love all of you so much and you all have a special place in my heart. You all are true friends. For Ziggy and Brian, words cannot express just how much I love you with all of my being. You have been a tremendous part of my life, my growth and my love. Brian I will never stop loving you, no matter what happens. No one on this planet will ever have my heart the way that you do and I know you feel the same. Ziggy, if it was not for your friendship and your honesty and of course your love and respect for me, I don't know where I would be right now. I feel like I am writing a speech for an Emmy or something but I need you guys to know how much you mean to me and I love you. For Tony, I would like to say thank you for being a part of my life 15 years ago and then again today. I know things are a little shaky but you will always have a friend in me. I love ya!
Katie

www.rubysfire.com

To my Ruby Princess . . . . I will never let you down

I'm not a perfect person
There are many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

www.rubysfire.com

MY POOR BABY

***BLOGGER BLOCKED***
UPDATE MORE TOMORROW.
ZIGGY


www.rubysfire.com

***PARTIALLY BLOCKED*** I am so upset. I want my daddy . . . I want my mother. I want Brian. I am so sad. They won't let them come here . .. .. .WTF?????
I want to cry.



www.rubysfire.com

HOW DO I LOVE YOU??? HERE'S HOW:

How do I love you?
Well let me see
I love you like a lyric loves a melody
Maybe, completely wrapped up in you
How do I need you?
Well can't you tell?
I need you like a penny needs a wishing well
Maybe, completely wrapped in you
Every now and then when the world we're living in is crazy
You gladly hold me and carry me through
No one in the world has ever done the things you've done for me
And I'd be sad and lonely if there was no you
How do I love you?
Well count the ways
There is no number high enough to end this phrase
Baby, completely wrapped up in you

How do I love you?
Well don't you know
I love you as deep as any love can go
Maybe, completely wrapped up in you

Posted by Katie

www.rubysfire.com

It's a duet now.. how funny is that???? I love you baby xoxox

Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Baby, I love you
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...

I've got this jones forming in my bones, from a man
Who indeed took over my soul, understand
I couldn't breathe if he ever said, he would leave
Get on my knees, until they're bloody red, Begging please
See I don't know if you get it yet, just don't know
He's like the lighter to my cigarette, watch me smoke
I never knew another human life, Didn't know
could have the power to take over mine, so baby,

I love my Harley chic, man
She's in the shower singing "Chaka Khan- Sweet Thang"
But I'm on the block, gutter thuggin where the Bro's hang
Because all of my father figures came from a Bike gang
It's Crooked I, riding with me more
She's top notch, Boy a bentley is sore
She keeps her body covered in Christian Dior
Plus she's ready to ride with me in war
Who can ask for more?
Me and my...

Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Baby, I love you
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...

See I can never feel alone with you, in my life
I'll give up everything I own for you, won't think twice
Almost a shame how I'm mesmerised, Such a shame
I lose my thought looking in your eyes, in your eyes
Because your kisses make my lips quiver, kiss me
And when you touch me my whole body shivers, touch me
Now I can see how another life, another life
Could have the power to take over mine
Because you are my

Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Baby, I love you
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...

Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
(You with the blue eyes , we're gonna ride until we die ya know)
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
(With you and Hannah by my side we will always survive)
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
(Let me give you all my money and all of my paper)
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
(Whenever you need me call because its a done deal when we link)

And tell me, who could ever picture
That me and you would be together forever
I'm a biker, they said I'd never get you baby
I'm running the turf, you want me coming to church
How can I come, when I know I keep guns under my shirt
I love the street life,
But your love is a curse
And when I think about living without you Baby, I love you
Nothing is worse
I got my little red heads back,
it's more than just hopping in the sack I guess I possess a track

Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Love it when I hear your name, got me saying...
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby Baby, I love you

Posted by Katie
www.rubysfire.com

I have fallen in Love

I've fallen in love with you
Please, tell me, tell me what else was there to do
When feeling lips like yours and looking into eyes like yours
I might as well face it
Because it's true
Yes, I've fallen in love with you

Oh, my beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away

I've fallen in love with you baby, please stay
I've fallen in love with you

I've fallen in love with you
And you've just got to feel the same way too
When you embraced me last night
Goddess knows it was pure, such pure delight

My beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away

Oh yes, my love
Oh yes, my love
My darlin
I've fallen in love with you
I've fallen in love

I've fallen so deep in love you see
Until you become the very soul of me
Let me tell you something,
I don't care enough anyway
All over, hey, all over my face it shows
Said I'm talking about love this time
And you know what?
It's not a schoolgirl crush

baby, yea
Oh my beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away
My beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away

www.rubysfire.com

OUTLAWS MOTORCYCLE CLUB TAUNTON CHAPTER

TONIGHT AT 7 PM IS THE OUTLAWS ST. PATTY'S DAY EXTRAVAGANZA. IT IS BEING HELD AT THE LAFAYETTE IN TAUNTON, MA. $15 OR $20 TO GET IN. IT SHOULD BE A PARTY AND A HALF SO COME AND SHOW YOUR SUPPORT FOR KATIE'S FAVORITE MEN. SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL OUTLAW MOTORCYCLE CLUB!!!!!!!!!!
SAY IT TO MY FACE!!!


www.rubysfire.com

WHO HAS A BOOTIE CALL FOR OVER 2 YEARS????? ME OF COURSE

www.rubysfire.com

To the Best Bootie Call of 2 and a 1/2 years ahahaha

Baby you're the man
Because you put it on me
And in the morning
I roll over and feel you touching me
I have another man
But he's not like you
And I cant be your baby's mother
Though I'd like to
Call me real late at night
When my man's asleep
And catch a red eye
To the west side up and down my spine
And let you feel what you've been missing
I'm so bonafide

Call me
when you need me
Baby, you dont have to worry
Call me
We can do something

Baby, take my hand
When you're feeling lonely
It doesn't matter where you are
Just let me put it on you
I got another man
But he's not like you
And I cant be your full time lover
Though I'd like to

Call me
when you need me
Baby, you dont have to worry
Climb up my stairs late at night
Call me
I'll answer the door when you do your secret knock
We can do something

www.rubysfire.com

MR. M

LOVERS FOREVER, FACE TO FACE. MY CITY OR MOUNTAINS, STAY WITH ME STAY. I NEED YOU TO LOVE ME, I NEED YOU TODAY. GIVE TO ME YOUR LEATHER, TAKE FROM ME MY LACE.

THERE ARE 86,400 SECONDS IN A DAY . . . I KNOW BECAUSE I COUNTED

www.rubysfire.com

I HAVE MY OWN ROOM . . .

www.rubysfire.com

I'm BORED I'm BORED . . . . . I want to go home so bad and lie in my cloud bed. I want to sit on my couch and watch Americsan Chopper and Trading Spaces all day long. I want LIFETIME MOVIE NETWORK....WAhhhhhh I am so insanely bored and stresses out I am going to freak out literally. I am sooooooooooooooo Bored!!!!!! I wanna go home pleaseeeeee.....
www.rubysfire.com

Ever wish you were anywhere in the world except for where you were right now? I want to be on a Hawaiian island, lying on the beach with no worries, no cares, no injury, no pain . . . . just there being myself and taking in deep breaths of the sea air. What I would give to be in Hawaii right now.
Katie

www.rubysfire.com

Ruby Irish Girl

THE IRISH GIRL

I stepped out one morning
Down by the riverside;
I cast my eyes all around me,
That blue-eyed girl I spied.

So red and rosy were her cheeks,
And Ruby was her hair,
How costly was the jewelry
That blue-eyed girl did wear.

Tears came rolling down her cheeks,
How mournful she did cry:
"My love has gone and left me,
And surely I will die."

Love, it is a killing thing
Did you ever feel the pang?
How hard it is to be in love
And can't be loved again.

I wish I were in Dublin,
A-sitting in my chair,
A glass of brandy in my hand,
My arms around my dear.

I'd wish for whiskey, Roman wine,
I'd drink before I'd go;
I'd sail through the deepest ocean,
Let the wind blow high or low.

www.rubysfire.com

FINNEGAN'S WAKE

Tim Finnegan lived in Walkin' Street
A gentleman, Irish, mighty odd;
He had a brogue both rich and sweet
And to rise in the world he carried a hod.
Now Tim had a sort of the tipplin' way
With a love of the whiskey he was born
And to help him on with his work each day
He'd a "drop of the cray-thur" every morn.

Whack fol the darn O, dance to your partner
Whirl the floor, your trotters shake;
Wasn't it the truth I told you
Lots of fun at Finnegan's wake!

One mornin' Tim was feelin' full
His head was heavy which made him shake;
He fell from the ladder and broke his skull
And they carried him home his corpse to wake.
They rolled him up in a nice clean sheet
And laid him out upon the bed,
A gallon of whiskey at his feet
And a barrel of porter at his head.

His friends assembled at the wake
And Mrs. Finnegan called for lunch,
First they brought in tay and cake
Then pipes, tobacco and whiskey punch.
Biddy O'Brien began to bawl
"Such a nice clean corpse, did you ever see?
"O Tim, mavourneen, why did you die?"
Arragh, hold your gob said Paddy McGhee!

Then Maggie O'Connor took up the job
"O Biddy," says she, "You're wrong, I'm sure"
Biddy she gave her a belt in the gob
And left her sprawlin' on the floor.
And then the war did soon engage
'Twas woman to woman and man to man,
Shillelagh law was all the rage
And a row and a ruction soon began.

Then Mickey Maloney ducked his head
When a noggin of whiskey flew at him,
It missed, and falling on the bed
The liquor scattered over Tim!
The corpse revives! See how he raises!
Timothy rising from the bed,
Says,"Whirl your whiskey around like blazes
Thanum an Dhul! Do you thunk I'm dead?"



www.rubysfire.com

When Irish Eyes Are Smilin'

When Irish Eyes Are Smiling
When Irish eyes are smiling,
Sure it's like a morning spring.
In the lilt of Irish laughter,
You can hear the angels sing.
When Irish hearts are happy,
All the world seems bright and gay.
And when Irish eyes are smiling,
Sure, they steal your heart away.
There's a tear in your eye,
and I'm wondering why,
For it never should be there at all.
With such power in your smile,
sure a stone you'd beguile,
So there's never a teardrop should fall.
When your sweet lilting laughter's like some fairy song,
And your eyes twinkle bright as can be,
You should laugh all the while and all other times smile,
And now smile a smile for me.
When Irish eyes are smiling,
Sure it's like a morning spring.
In the lilt of Irish laughter,
You can hear the angels sing.
When Irish hearts are happy,
All the world seems bright and gay.
And when Irish eyes are smiling,
Sure, they steal your heart away.
www.rubysfire.com

WHEN IRISH EYES ARE LAUGHING

ALMOST FORGOT TO WISH EVERYONE A HAPPY ST. PATTY'S DAY!!!! DRINK LOTS OF GREEN BEER FOR ME TONIGHT . . . I HAVE A SECRET STASH ARRIVING TONIGHT . . SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I WILL TOAST UP TO YOU ALL ....TOAST ONE TO ME O.K.??

www.rubysfire.com

Greetings from Me . . . .

DON'T FORGET ABOUT KATIE & LIZ'S FAVORITE BAND THIS WEEKEND

DOUBLESHOT IS PLAYING AT THE VARSITY CLUB ON SATURDAY MARCH 20, 2004. SHOW STARTS AT 9:30 pm and GET THIS . .. . .NO COVER CHARGE .. Awwww Yeahhh.
CHECK OUT THEIR WEBSITES:

http://www.bostonbands.com/band_layout2.asp?bid=5377

http://www.geocities.com/doubleshotboston/

He's got eyes of the bluey skies and if they thought of rain, I'd hate to look into those eyes and see an ounce of pain. His hair reminds me of a warm, safe place where as a child I'd hide and pray for the thunder and the rain to quietly pass me by . . Wooooo ohhh Sweet Child O' Mine.

www.rubysfire.com

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding
pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when
someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I will share more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just
been straightened and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was
guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that
the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist in a miracle.

Instead of worrying about where my daughter's dad was throughout our relationship, I would have spent every waking moment molding her to be better than me.

Instead of living in a 3 bedroom home and struggling hand to mouth, I would have rented a one bedroom, quit 2 of my jobs and been more involved with my daughter and her activities.

When my daughter kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for
dinner." There would have been more "I love you's." More "I'm sorry's."

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it ..
live it and never give it back. Stop sweating the small stuff.

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.

Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

Let's think about what we have been blessed with. And what we are doing each day to promote ourselves
mentally, physically, emotionally.

My life has been changed completely and from now on I am not taking anything or anyone for granted. My entire life flashed in front of me and when I heard that saying before it was hard to believe. Drastically and with force, my entire world was rocked. I may never be able to walk on my right leg. I may never be able to write correctly. I may never be able to speak or chew the way I have always known how to. Sad? yes I am sad. Mad? yes I am very mad. But what I have learned from the 3 human beings who have done nothing except eat, sleep, and breathe me and my accident, the past 8 days (since the 8th of March), is inconceivable. I knew how much I loved these people, I never understood their love for me. I took for granted their love. I took for granted alot of people's love. I never could grasp the fact when they told me they cared for or loved me. I didn't believe it. I always stretched for the inside reason. I know now there was no "inside reason". I am so sorry to you all for my one track mind. I am so sorry for the way I may have made you feel unloved. I apologize for ever leading you to think you were not good enough or you were not worthy. Who am I to ever think that? I am sorry. I am tired. I am hurting but I needed to type something I was going insane. . . . . .

www.rubysfire.com

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UPDATE

THE WAKE IS TONIGHT FROM 5-9 IN TEWKSBURY. THE BURIAL IS TOMORROW AT 10 AM IN NORTH REDDING. THAT IS ALL I KNOW. I DON'T REALLY KNOW HER. BUT THE INFO IS IN THE PAPERS I WOULD ASSUME.


www.rubysfire.com

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SWEET DREAMS . . I hope your headache goes away tonight

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GAGS

I want to get to know you
I really want to thug you, baby
I'm lost in your loving
I really want to drive you crazy
I wanna be your lover
I wanna get to thank you, lady
I'm lost in your loving
I really want to drive you crazy
I'm loving how you look in my eyes, swinging those hips when you pass
I'm visualizing my name tattooed on that ass Katie
Jump on this Harley, let's go smoke some of that Bob Marley
Sip some Bacardi then go pull up at the after party
I think we make a perfect couple, but you think I'm trouble
Maybe that's the reason you gave me the wrong number (what?)
She's got me feeling like maybe she's the wrong woman
Think I'll be chasing the chickenhead, you're on something
Your toes painted, hair fixed all the time
And your Gucci suit the same color as mine
If you read between the lines you can see that I want you
I betcha I'll have you doing what you said that you won't do
Make a decision shorty, good things don't last long
Your girlfriend keeps showing me that thong
Before I head home I'm gonna stop at your house and blow the horn
If you come outside you know it's on, holla atcha boy
Now bitches get frustrated with a baller, wonder why I don't call her
Maybe because I'm busy and she needs someone to spoil her
It gets annoying, from time to time I gotta ignore her
In order to let her know that we're friends and noting more
She loves it when I'm in town, hates it when I'm not around
I get her and wear her down, next door neighbors hear the sound
Pictures hitting the ground, just enough to hold us down
I'm sticking and moving, cruising after the third round
Just lay back baby and let me drive you crazy
I can make a forty-year old feel like a young lady
I admit I fell in love with a friend
And to make her feel special I let her call me by my government name
Her panties wet over fame, fell in love with my chain
I wonder if I wasn't an entertainer, would she remain?
Surrounding me, hounding me, trying to be my ONLY
I'm not your boyfriend, I'm your HOMEY
Don't know what fucks me up more, watching her lick her lips
Or watching her walk, she hypnotized me with her hips man
I'll sweet talk her if she likes
Cause all she really wants is an Outlaw to treat her right, right?
Look, I'm legit now, I used to break laws
Now you can reap the benefits of world tours
Big house, big Benz, girl it's yours
Mink coats, Italian shoes, stones with no flaws
You don't have to look like a model for me to adore you
All you gotta do is love me and be loyal
Don't indulge in my past, fuck what happened before you
Cause to me some bunny's gonna hate you that never saw you
C'mere, let me touch on you, I let you touch on me
Put my tongue on you, you put your tongue on me
Let me ride on you and you can ride on me
We can do it all the night, we can have a ball tonight

www.rubysfire.com

BLOGGER DELETED

SOMEONE TAPE AMERICAN CHOPPERS FOR KATIE TONIGHT PLEASE
THANK YOU


www.rubysfire.com

BRING MY SWEATS AND SOME YOU KNOW WHAT


www.rubysfire.com

***BLOGGER FREEZE HAS EXPIRED**** SIGN ON AT THE MAIN PAGE FOR THIS POST

QUICK UPDATE OR QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT ***BLOGGER BLOCKED***
THANK YOU



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GET WELL BABY GIRL . . . .WE MISS THOSE GORGEOUS EYES BEING OPEN


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For you Princess

Katie
By Phillip and Natalie LaRue
Fell into a dream again, wish the dream would never ever end
Met an angel with eyes the deepest blue I've ever seen
Just wish it wasn't a dream

She took me away and we flew across the skies
This angel looked familiar, and then I opened up my eyes to see
It was just a dream

A few days later I saw you, remembered my dream, can this be true?
You're the angel with eyes the deepest blue I've ever seen
This time it wasn't a dream

A few days later I looked into, the lovely eyes of Katie
I told you about my dream, and then your eyes began to gleam

We took hand in hand, and we walked across time
And every day I thank God for making you mine
We took hand in hand, and we walked across time
And every day I thank God for making you mine

Thank you for being you



www.rubysfire.com

Good Night Katie Belle, Good Night

There is no deeper blue
in the ocean that lies
as deep as the blue
of your laughing eyes
no sweeter sound
than your gentle sigh
no heart was ever so pure
Dream pretty dreams
touch beautiful things
let all the skies surround you
swim with the swans
and believe that upon
some glorious dawn
love will find you

Come some day
I'm bound away
wind and wings on the water
whatever may
you must stay
and remain my beautiful Princess

There is no deeper blue
in the ocean that lies
as deep as the blue
of your laughing eyes
no sweeter sound
than your gentle sigh
no heart was ever so pure

Good night Katie Belle, good night



www.rubysfire.com

THANK YOU

www.rubysfire.com

What's so maybe about
What's so maybe about
What's so maybe about Katie?

What's the use in hesitating?
Can't you see that Katie's waiting?
Just because her youth is fading
Doesn't mean that she's not worth dating

What's so maybe about
What's so maybe about
What's so maybe about Katie?

I don't know what the fuss is all about
Just take it slow
It's not like you can't live without her
To and fro
If you've got a shred of doubt then it's not worth it

What's so maybe about
What's so maybe about
What's so maybe about Katie?

Can't you see her with her arms wide open
She's everything that you've been hoping for
Forever's not so long, stop moping
She's got a daughter and you're just not coping.

Do you know everyone you ever swore you'd love for life
I don't know them anymore
I know their names
I'd recognize them on the street and I don't love them

www.rubysfire.com

To my Angel Baby Ruby Princess

When the day is long and the night, the night is yours alone,
when you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on.
Don't let yourself go, everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes.

Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it's time to sing along.
When your day is night alone, hold on
if you feel like letting go, hold on
when you think you've had too much of this life, well hang on.

Everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends.
Everybody hurts. Don't throw your hand. Oh, no. Don't throw your hand.
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life, the days and nights are long,
when you think you've had too much of this life to hang on.

Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes.
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on.
Everybody hurts. You are not alone.

~Everybody Hurts By R.E.M.






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QUICK UPDATE OR QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT FOR THOSE WHO DO NOT KNOW

KATIE WAS ***BLOGGER BLOCKED AND LOCKED***
THANK YOU




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FREAK

I'm already going to D'Anns dumb ass. I will be there at 8:00 pm too..... ya big freak. I am NOONE'S . . .not tonight, not tomorrow , not ever . . . GOT IT??????? GOOD.
~Katie
www.rubysfire.com

KATIE ANNE FLANNERY

WE ARE GOING TO D'ANN'S IN HOLBROOK AT 8:00 PM. MAKE SURE YOU LEAVE YOUR DOOR UNLOCKED. I AM COMING UP TO GET YOU....MAKE UP OR NOT, HAIR STRAIGHT OR CURLY . . . YOU ARE MINE FOR TONIGHT. GOT IT?>?>?>?>?>?>? GOOD


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***BLOGGER HAS BEEN BLOCKED FOR AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY***

Passcode is His Name + birthdate. . . . Other code has been terminated.
Please sign on to Blogger.com and enter it
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I don't have words to really express how I feel right now. I am devestated and completely speechless. I don't know what I am ever going to do with myself. I don't know how I can wake up every day for the rest of my life without him. I lied when I said I was geting stronger. I am forever weak and pitiful. Without him in my life I will never be happy. Now that he is gone, now that I will never be able to touch his cheek or hold his hand, I am dead. My heart is no longer in existence. There is no God. There is no higher power. There is nothing but sadness.
I keep remembering him in the truck as he was driving away from me. He beeped his horn and gave me a wave. That beautiful smile that drove off was heart wrenching.
I have destroyed my cameras from the trip we took last weekend and I am tears now trying to figure out how to salvage any of the film. Our last days . . . . gone forever. I just want to die.
I am changing my phone number. I am secluding myself from everyone in my life. My mother is taking Hannah for a few days and I am just going to sit in my house upon my roof top and cry until my body and my soul can take it no more.
I just want to see him again. I just want to feel his fingers.
His hair is still in my bathroom from when he shaved his head. I can't even pick it up. I am so beyond sad. I am way beyond mourning.
I am dead.


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To my Cowboy

I went to work for him that summer
A helpless girl so far from home
He was a lonely widow man
Hell bent to make it on his own
We were a thousand miles from nowhere
Wheat fields as far as I could see
Both needing something from each other
Not knowing yet what that might be

Until he came to me one evening
Hot cup of coffee and a smile
In a suit that I was certain
He hadn’t worn in quite a while
There was a difference in his laughter
There was a softness in his eyes
And on the air there was a hunger
Even a girl could recognize

He had a need to feel the thunder
To chase the lightning from the sky
To watch a storm with all its wonder
Written in his lover’s eyes
He had to ride the heat of passion
Like a comet burning bright
Rushing headlong in the wind
Now where only dreams have been
Burning both ends of the night

That summer wind was all around me
Nothing between us but the night
When I told him that I’d never
He softly whispered that’s alright
And then I watched his hands of leather
Turn to velvet in a touch
There’s never been a summer
When I have ever learned so much

We had a need to feel the thunder
To chase the lightning from the sky
To watch a storm with all its wonder
Written in his lover’s eyes
He had to ride the heat of passion
like a comet burning bright
Rushing headlong in the wind
Now where only dreams have been
Burning both ends of the night

I often think about that summer
The sweat, the moonlight and the lace
And I have rarely held another
When I haven’t seen his face
And every time I pass a wheat field
And watch it dancing with the wind
Although I know it isn’t real
I just can’t help but feel
His hungry arms again

He had a need to feel the thunder
To chase the lightning from the sky
To watch a storm with all its wonder
Written in his lover’s eyes
He had to ride the heat of passion
Like a comet burning bright
Rushing headlong in the wind
Now where only dreams have been
Burning both ends of the night

Rushing in long in the wind
Now where only dreams have been
Burning both ends of the night

www.rubysfire.com

B

The last time I saw him it was turning colder
But that was months ago
Last I heard he had moved to Vegas
But where he is now I don’t know
But there’s something about this time of year
That spins my head around
Takes me back and makes me wonder
What he’s doing now
Because what he's doing now is tearing me apart
Filling up my mind and emptying my heart
I can hear him call each time the cold wind blows
And I wonder if he knows what I'm doing now

Just for laughs I dialed his old number
But no one knew his name
Hung up the phone sat there and wondered
If he’d ever done the same
I took a walk in the evening wind
To clear my head somehow
But tonight I lie here thinking
What he's doing now

Because what he’s doing now is tearing me apart
Filling up my mind and emptying my heart
I can hear him call each time the cold wind blows
And I wonder if he knows what I'm doing now.


www.rubysfire.com

Can you imagine us making love?
The way it would feel the first time
that we touch
Can you think of it the way
I dream of it?
I want you to see it like I'm seeing it
It's a picture of perfection
The vision of you and I
Your lips upon my lips
Can you just picture this?
Your fingertips on my fingertips
Your skin upon my skin
Would be the sweetest sin
All night I lay awake
Because it's too much to take
Dreaming about the love that we
could make
All day I think of schemes
To get you next to me
I want you so bad that I can barely breathe
It's a sign of my obsession
That I can't stop thinking about
Your lips upon my lips
Can you envision it?
Temptation I could never resist
Your skin upon my skin
Would be the sweetest sin
That would be the sweetest sin
It would feel so good
to be so bad
You don't know how bad
I want that
I would do anything
to feel
Your lips upon my lips
Can you just picture this?
Your fingertips on my fingertips
Your skin upon my skin
Would be the sweetest sin,
You are the sweetest sin
Your lips upon my lips
Would be the sweetest sin..

www.rubysfire.com

YOU TAKE MY EVERY BREATH . . . AWAY

take it, take it all away
take my breath away
you take my breath away

Look into my eyes and you'll see I'm the only one
You've captured my love stolen my heart
Changed my life
Every time you make a move you destroy my mind
And the way you touch
I lose control and shiver deep inside
You take my breath away

You can reduce me to tears with a single sigh
Every breath that you take
Any sound that you make is a whisper in my ear
I could give up all my life for just one kiss
I would surely die if you dismiss me from your love
You take my breath away

So please don't go
Don't leave me here all by myself
I get so lonely from time to time
I will find you anywhere you go
I'll be right behind you
Right until the ends of the earth
I'll get no sleep until I find you
To tell you that you just take my breath away

I will find you anywhere you go
Right until the ends of the earth
I'll get no sleep until I find you
To tell you when I've found you
I love you

Take my breath, take my breath ... away
~Ruby
www.rubysfire.com

I COULD NOT RESIST THIS ONE!!!!!! HAHAHAHA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Five tips for a woman....
1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job.
2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.
3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you.
4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.
5. It is important that these four men don't know each other. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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MARCH 2004 . . . BLA BLA BLAAING AGAIN .. Ahh it's actually good to be home.

People come into your life for a Reason, a Season or a Lifetime. When you know which one it is for a person, you will know what to do for that person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.
They may seem like a Godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered, and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons: things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what
you learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
Thank you for being a part of my life.
www.rubysfire.com

MISSES AND KISSES RIGHT BACK ATCHA . . . WITH NOTHING BUT A T-SHIRT ON I CAN SAY ANYTHING CRAZY . . .

Posted to: Ruby@rubysfire.com
Posted by: MM1per@yahoo.com
Date Posted: 08-03-2004 01:34:14am EST
Subject: The Song of the Century . .
Message: It has only been 58 minutes since you headed back to Mass and we are already missing you. Here is the song . . . . from the bottom of my heart. Miss you girl. It was so good to see you

On my way for the day I find no sorrow
Everyday is all the same there's no tomorrow
And I feel like I feel
Cause it's cold here where you left me

Hey I think that someday I might need you somehow
I, I think I might have loved you
These things I said but you were
A million miles away

On my way for the day I find my heart is not for taking
And I know it's all but gone
It only served to make me cry
And I feel like I feel
Cause it's black here with your memory

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***THIS BLOGGER BLOCKED FOR AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY*** Count #23425

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WITH YOU, BABY I FEEL FREE..... I WANT TO BE BACK IN DAYTONA IN MY T-SHIRT LAUGHING ON THE TOP OF YOUR ROOF ABOUT THE GOOD OLD DAYS.I ALREADY MISS U

The real me is a Northern girl with her Levis on and an open heart
Wish I could save the world, like I was Super Girl
The real me is to laugh all night, lying in the grass just talking about love
But lately I've been jaded & life got so complicated
I start thinking about it,
I almost forgot what it was like,
to know what it feels like,
With you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you
With you
Now that I'm with you
You speak and it's like a song
And just like that all my walls come down
It's like a private joke just meant for us to know
I relate to you naturally
Everybody else just fades away
Sometimes it's hard to breathe
Just knowing you found me
Cause I start thinking about it,
I almost forgot what it was like to know what love feels like,
Cause with you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you
With you
Come and take me
Love you save me
Like nobody else
Now I can be myself
With you,
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you


www.rubysfire.com

MEMORIES UNFOLDED THIS WEEKEND . . . . SKELETONS CAME OUT

Beautiful child
Beautiful child
You are a beautiful child
And I am a fool once more

You fell in love when I was only ten
The years disappeared
Much has gone by since then
I bite my lip, can you send me away
You touch
I have no choice
I have to stay
I had to stay

Sleepless child
There is so little time
Your eyes say yes
But you don't say yes
I wish that you were mine

You say it will be harder in the morning
I wait for you to say, just go
Your hands, held mine so few hours
And I'm not a child anymore

I'm not a child anymore
I'm tall enough
To reach for the stars
I'm old enough
To love you from afar
To trusting... yes?
But then women usually are

I'm not a child anymore
No, I'm not a child, oh no
Tall enough to reach for the stars
I will do
As I'm told
Even if I never hold you again
I'll never hold you again

www.rubysfire.com

TO MINUS

Late at night when I close my eyes, I take a deep breath and my mind begins to roam. Although my mind races to alot of things, events or people in my life, I always wonder about this one person who has affected my life in such a strong and positive way. I always reflect upon my memories with him. He once told me that only I can make it happen. He was the one and only person who was actually so mad at me at one time because of the way I visioned life and how I lived it. He threw things at me all of the time that hit so very close to home. I can recall being so angry at him at first. I almost even walked away from our friendship. I used to think he was a cold hearted person when in reality he was the most caring, giving and advising human being I have ever met. I am giggling to myself, thinking of the last time I saw him. My face lit up, his face lit up and all of the grown men around us both were sickened. They still give him heat for that day. He ruined his tough guy image. It is so funny. He and I were inseperable, be it we were together or on the cell phones. The days of wisdom, growth and his "brotherly" ways ended one day. He packed up his stuff and jumped on his Harley and rode to a sunny little place called Jacksonville Florida.
I thought it was the end. Come to find out, it only got better. We talk every now and then now. We speak as if he is still one town away. The phone bills were getting too ridiculously high that we had to pace ourselves. But when I reach Daytona Beach, Florida I am anxious to see my favorite man, my friend, my big "Brother". I want him to know that every night while I lie awake in bed, that I am thinking of him and wondering if he is o.k. Minus, I miss you and I love you with all of my heart. You have changed my life and I want to thank you for that. I see Spanky all of the time and when I see him all I can think about is you. You are a wonderful individual and I will never forget you or stop being your friend . . no matter what. I am dying to see you in a few hours, I can't wait to hug you and hang out with you. See you soon! Spanky, I miss you too, very much!
~Katie


www.rubysfire.com

I'M BAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!! MISS ME?

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Greetings from Logan Airport. Flights have been delayed. I am going mad here and I am anxious to land in sunny Florida. Hopefully I won't be moody and crampy when I get there. Apparently we are taking off in an hour so I have time to kill. I will be sure to touch base once we are at the house in Daytona. Well I just wanted to say hi and let everyone know I will not be in Mass for a few days.
I will talk to you all soon and don't worry, I will have fun. My bike has been down there for a week now and I am itching to cruise



www.rubysfire.com

Turn around. Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming around. Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears. Turn around. Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by. Turn around. Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes. Turn around, Bright Eyes.
www.rubysfire.com

KATIE'S GOT BETTE DAVIS EYES

Her hair is Ruby Red,
Her lips sweet surprise
Her hands are never cold
She's got Bette Davis eyes
She'll turn her music on
You won't have to think twice
She's pure as New York snow
She got Bette Davis eyes
And she'll tease you
She'll unease you
All the better just to please you
She's precocious
And she knows just what it
Takes to make a pro blush
She got Greta Garbo Stand off sighs,
she's got Bette Davis eyes
She'll let you take her home
It wets her appetite
She'll lay you on her throne
She got Bette Davis eyes
She'll take a tumble on you
Roll you like you were dice
Until you come out blue
She's got Bette Davis eyes
She'll expose you
When she snows you
Off your feet with the crumbs she throws you
She's ferocious
And she knows just what it Takes to make a pro blush
All the boys Think she's a spy,
she's got Bette Davis eyes
And she'll tease you
She'll unease you
All the better just to please you
She's precocious
And she knows just what it Takes to make a pro blush
All the boys Think she's a spy,
she's got Bette Davis eyes




www.rubysfire.com

A little taste of the beginning, middle and end of the transcript

Gravel, wood chips, and dust collected in my knees, as I crawl out to runaway.

A Burning church, pushed away high clouds of black smoke which edge the sky above the tall flames. Up higher and higher it disappears like a balloon lost in the sea of the horizon. Orange and Violet strokes of paint across the fading October day. The last golden rays of the disappearing sun poaching out of the dark fire clouds appears on the stain glass above the burning attic.

Looking from afar, I catch a glimpse behind my shoulder and stand quietly as I give a small smirk to the trees and wind. My hair falling all around me hovering my bare shoulders. This sin will spread like the wings of a black crow taking flight during a rainstorm.

I walked carelessly down a grassy hill, every now and then pushing my mattered wet hair behind my ears, and stopping to catch my breath.

I look up once more to see the world beginning to turn. I stand with my hands on my sides to keep me balanced as the ground shifts below my feet.

My lungs and skin are covered in black fog, and my face is no longer pale white snow.

As the sun begins to find it's place in bed, I sit beneath a tall oak tree. Bird songs, embracing the coming of the new fall, welcoming the violent night before me.

They seem to know more about myself then I do.

It's disturbing because I've been searching all these years for answers, and the only way I can get anyone to make any sense is to tie them up and leave them to burn.

Loud crashing lighting, thunder above my head. It's beautiful see and comforting to know I'm not that only one who gets angry.

But why am I the only one who feels abused?

I run out to the falling rain and twirl in circles until my body falls to the mud and my sore knees begin to bleed.

I lay my body down and feel the storm begin to wash out all the darkness within my soul.

It feels so wonderful to know that even in death beauty is everlasting.



www.rubysfire.com

I HATE MEN . . ha ha ha

At night the fool lays down in bed
awaiting for her lover.
Refusal of the thought that
he is laying with another.
Her love is blind, resist these thoughts!
but others see her pain.
But in her mind, she's doing wrong
and she's the one to blame.
People try to tell her how much
better off she'd be.
But through her pain and suffering
she's blind and cannot see.
So please be quiet--let her sleep,
escaping from her fears.
To sleep away
another day
her lover is her tears.


www.rubysfire.com

When He Comes Home

I hear him pull in
I look out the window
I think to myself
"Where did he go?"
I look at the clock
It's nearing midnight
He's parked crooked again
Something's not right
He's walking up the stairs
I slink back to our room
I hear him at the door
He'll be inside soon
I then hear the cursing
As he walks inside
I pull the blanket over my head
That's where I hide
I don't want to see him
He's drinking again
I hate him like this
When will this all end
I wish he would stop
He gets drunk all the time
And then likes to pretend
Everything is fine
I hate this feeling
I hate being alone
But I hate it the most
When _ _ _ _ _ comes home



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BLA BLA BLA DEPRESSION

Where is the fine line of sanity's seduction,
Does it sleep by society's code of normalcy?
Depression is my one loyal friend,
Through the years, down in the fears,
Griping at my ambivalence to the end.
I hurt myself, my skin on the outside,
In attempts to kill that thing on the inside.
Seeing death is more than a brink of insanity,
It's deep, dismal prison in which to hide,
It makes dreaming about death like ice cream.
We are not crazy, we are our senses amplified.
You found it a game to watch my pain,
Did you pause and think of the scars on my soul?
My heart was bruised, torn and used,
Yet I followed you blindly into a blackening hole.
Love to me was a feeling new and pure,
Emotions unknown consumed my whole heart
You took my love and made it your whore,
Dissected my spirit and ripped it apart
I could see what you were doing to me,
And I hid my eyes, willed myself to be blind.
It was true that I was afraid to be free,
You pulled my soul too fiercely then left me behind.
I loved you for the attention you gave,
I loved so completely, with all of my power.
But I can't stay confined in this lonely cave,
I will break from your clutch, I will no longer cower.
The darkness still rips silently and cruelly within.
It consumes and it corrodes, crawling through this skin.
I've fabricated my life with lies, creating your love.
Something that never existed. A Blackened, broken dove.
Love clawed all truth from my blinded eyes.
Now I can see and now I despise.
Hate seethes inside and will never again be contained.
I give myself to the loathing that courses in these veins


www.rubysfire.com

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I am going to FLIP MY LID because I just typed about 2 pages of blogger and hit escape by accident and fucking deleted the entire contents. I am so flipping mad right now. I finally blew my head gasket!!! Steam is literally blowing out of my ears right now...... I am on fire.

KATIE
THE BOYS ARE DOWN IN FLA WAITING FOR THE RUBY PRINCESS. THE BIKE IS HERE AND READY TO FLY. HURRY DOWN BECAUSE THE BEST IS YET TO COME SUGAR SUGAR. YOU KNOW WHERE TO GO WHEN YOU GET TO DAYTONA......... JUST FOLLOW THE COLORS.
ZIG

www.rubysfire.com

DAYTONA COUNT DOWN : 2 more days
WOO HOO HOO HOO!!!!!www.rubysfire.com